I have to say that I am very much against couples having many children as a matter of fact I believe that we should have a law that says as Nigerians we shouldn’t have more than four children(left to me two is enough) at most and every couple should be subjected to compulsory family planning.
Like I said, I wrote an article relating
to child abuse and the above phrase was the title of the article, the article
was about an eight years old girl that I saved from sexual abuse. She sells
minerals and bottle water and after sales that day she returned home, unfortunately
for her she misplaced N1000 and her mother had to send her out of the house to
go look for the money. It was in the process of looking for the money around
nine in the night that she almost got rape, in that article I said children shouldn’t
be the one to carter for their parent and that couples shouldn’t get pregnant
if they know they can’t take care of their
child. (Click Here to read the full article)
Today I want to talk about an issue I am
sure many of you have heard or read about and that is the issue of the man who
ran away because his wife gave birth to their third set of twins. It was said
that the man’s wife had already given birth to two set of twins (that four
children already) and was expecting her third set of twins when the husband ran
away. The wife who delivered her first set of twins in 2009 said she was doing
the normal traditional family planning and it has been working well until now,
she used the age difference between her first set of twins and her second set
of twins to prove her point, it is a four years gap. This is what she had to
say when this one occurred “You know as
women, we cannot deny our husband that thing whenever they request for it.
Whenever I mistakenly take in, he would say that I was pretending. Sometimes, I
would go through long process to abort the pregnancy. After that, another one
would happen. I would still have to go through the process again to abort it.
When this one happened he still insisted that I was pretending until the
pregnancy became obvious”.
Now here is my first set of questions “if
she had gone for proper family planning would this have occurred? “Aren’t there
pills you can take to prevent pregnancy before and after sex? “What kind of man
wouldn’t believe his wife when she says she is pregnant? As you help me answer
these questions please allow me to continue with my article.
Let me start with the man, with the way
things are in Nigeria now it is only sensible and advisable that couples shouldn’t
give birth to more than four children if they really want to take care of them.
The man who goes by the name Mr. Emeka Uche is a factory worker and that kind
of work doesn’t give you the kind of finance that you need to take good care of
two children in present day Nigeria not to talk of four or six children. Mr.
Uche knew perfectly well that is finance status couldn’t allow him carter for
an extra child let alone twins but still he went ahead to impregnate his wife
who she didn't believe when she told him that she was pregnant. He said things
became rough for him after they had their first set of twins and the situation
only got worse when they had their second set of twins. At this point he should
have been thinking of how to manage the little they have so that his family
would be able to survive not having sex with his wife and ignoring the fact
that she might get pregnant again. When he was asked why he ran away he had
this to say “How do I watch my kids
suffer? I could not tolerate it. I did not even have money to assist my family.
I watched them suffer daily, without knowing what to do”. “I am a factory
worker and I earn N33,000 after tax and union fees. Then I have four children
and a wife to take care of which has been very difficult, I could not stand
having a new set of twins that will come to this world to suffer”. If he
knew he couldn’t watch them suffer then why did he have sex with his wife
without protection or why didn't he go for family planning at least even if it
is just to go ask for ways of having sex with his wife without getting her
pregnant because the last time I checked asking for information in the hospital
is free and family planning are also free in government hospital (not 100%
sure about that).
From the woman perspective I understand
the fact that you can’t deny your husband sex whenever he wants it but if she didn't
want the third pregnancy like she said she should have reached out to hospitals
where they can tell her on the steps she could use so that she would enjoy sex
with her husband and she won’t get pregnant. The fact that she was using the
traditional method of family planning means she knows what family planning
could do, what would it have cost her to visit a hospital to do the proper
family planning? She is a private school teacher which also means that
some if not most of her colleagues at work her educated people, people she
could have seek advice from about this issue, at least if there is one thing
women like to discuss about, it is maternity issue.
Issue like this would keep popping up
every now and then if the government do not take adequate measure against birth
control and people would keep running to the government for help because I also
read that the Lagos State Government and some well meaning Nigerians have been
able to help the woman which was also want prompted the return of her husband. If
there is a law that controls how couples in Nigeria give birth then I am very
sure that issue like this won’t be happening. If every couple are subjected to compulsory
family planning then they would be able to have sex with their wives without
the fear of getting her pregnant because they would have been told on how to
avoid unwanted pregnancy even without the use of condom. Birth control has been
said to be a very significant factor in determining the development and growth
of a nation’s economy and like we all know that at the moment our economy is nothing
to write home about, it is only advisable that the government should control
the number of children a family must have in Nigeria. I mean let assume that we have a birth control
law that stipulate the number of children a family should have with strict punishment
for offenders, do you think this man would ignore the fact that having sex with
his wife without protection would result into pregnancy, nope I don't think so
Feel free to share your thought and
contribution on this issue, thank you
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